Posted by Jamie @ Bellerbys Brighton
And what a journey it's been. A year and half away from the family really puts the spotlight on one's identity. It's hard to believe that it's all behind me, actually, and that I'm on my way to greater things. Time is such a deceiving concept - we never seem to feel like it's in sync with our lives, or rather, we are in sync with time. When we want it to go slow, it runs faster than lightning but when we need it to go fast, it remains static. But in truth, it's the one constantly changing constant. I'd love to see the day when I finally fall into step with time; everyone has those rare moments when the two points meet and suddenly, there is no place or time more perfect.
Thinking reluctantly back, the past eighteen months of my life has really dragged me through personal growth. Today marks the end of so many things, most of which contain memories that are simly irreplacable and in some way, it saddens me to have to close that chapter. Knowing that the only way I can revisit and relive them again is by reading the very words I've written or viewing photographic fragments makes me that much more poignant. In some cases (if not most), all I have as a souvenir is based in the contraints of my mental capacity. And that's slightly worrying.
I feel like I've left so many great friends behind. In particular, I can't believe I won't be seeing Mr.Nix for a very long time. The thing about college which I guess I never realised before about school is that you grow very attached to the people you see everyday. They become great comforts to our daily lives because they tell us that everything is at its norm and that we do not have to be afraid of dramatic changes. I still remember when Mr.Nix was gone for two weeks and exactly how I felt each day when I walked into the studio faced with his absence. There was such a black hole in my heart purely because things felt so disorientating and deviant from my daily expectations. And we all have them about everyone and everything.
When we tried to say goodbye, it was surprisingly humorous. We procrastinated as we rambled on about derelict buildings and leaving traces of our presence behind wherever we are (sometimes in the form of a creepy dollhouse and awkwardly large musical tree). Then after what was meant to be a quick five minutes turned a lengthy half an hour, all I could do was give him the biggest bear hug I could manage with my all-encompassing arms. He has been my support and father figure for the past eighteen months and to be quite honest, he's become my family. When you think about all of the single-serving people that enter and exit your lives (as aptly put in Fight Club), your family are the only people that see you through the adversities. When you pepper time away with your friends, you all become a single entity. That's probably the best and worst thing about Bellerbys.
Well anyway, to be more concise with my final post, I'd best get to the thank you's and goodbye's. I'd die if I ever forget the amazing teachers that taught me - Dr. Cheng, Dr. Lively, Mrs. Dreiling, Mr.Nix. I have no complaints. Absolutely none. Dr. Cheng and Dr. Lively have been like my pseudo-moms, constantly caring about my general wellbeing both inside and outside the classroom. Mrs. Dreiling... where do I begin?! You are like my big sister, seeing as we seem to share many similar interests and you're always looking out for me.
I also have to give great thanks to the Art Department - Mr. Fraser, for always being patient with my pathetic computer-challenged ways; Mrs. McDurmot for always conjuring up some fantastical method for building something awesome (and her double bubble dippy doo-dah); Dr. Barr for always checking to see if I'm alright; Mrs. Stewart for being understanding with the havoc that I had wreaked in ALL studios and of course, Mrs. Rudkin for her beautiful Russian accent and inspirational ideas. Everyone has been so supportive of my work and I couldn't have done what I've done without them.
My great Art friends - Asty, Cristina, Chloe, Jia Ling and Weenie. I will surely miss our random talks on teenage pregnancies and romantic endeavours. Plus, not to mention our ice cream adventures at Boho Gelato.
Mr. Corcut, Mr. Addision, Toby, Fi, Agnes - You are all so willing to help and have also supported me throughout the course.
And of course, how could I ever forget my collection of friends? Too many of you guys to list out (and I'd hate to forget anyone's name) but you know who you are. Thanks for all the parties, the clubbing nights, the mafia games, the laughs and of course, the company. I still remember when I first came to Bellerbys last March and my grandmother had passed away. Dwelling in my room, I heard a shy knock on the door and opened it to a crowd of sympathetic faces. That was one of the sweetest things that has happened to me.
I'll not go without a grateful thanks to the cleaners who hopelessly attempt to clean my room every Wednesday morning (thanks for vacuuming around the junk) and of course the canteen people who usually sneak a few extra servings for me. Mrs. Peers, ever willing to print my impossibly lengthy documents.
I've learned a lot about myself and gained a bit, lost a bit. So as I've said before, I'm off to do great things now. Hopefully, everyone I know is out to do the same.
Jamie is studied A Levels at Bellerbys College Brighton and is heading to California to study Experimental Animation at university in September.